Consequences of Negative Beliefs on Perfectionism

When the athlete gets caught up in the Perfectionism Dilemma, and fully experiencing the impact of the pain points the ensuing consequences can cause things to spiral out of control.  See if you can identify with one or more of these key points.

1.    You never feel like you are good enough.  The pain gets worse.  How many times have you been in situations or see your son or daughter feeling like they can never do anything right?

2.    You feel you are valued by others based on your success.  The pain gets worse.  You feel like your friends, teammates, and friends value you based on your success on the field. You sometimes are shunned and you feel really bad.

3.    You take mistakes really hard so avoid making mistakes and no longer engage and become an active part of the game. When this happens you simply go “invisible.” This is happens when you are afraid to make mistakes.

4.    Performance is always tentative and you focus on what you think you “should do,” rather than focus on the playing with a functional mindset.  When you are focused on what you should be doing it’s challenging to be focused in the present and let things happen and trust in the skills you have practiced.

5.    You are vulnerable, emotional, freeze up and feels rejected. Vulnerability has to do with self-esteem and being accepted or rejected. You don’t want to make mistakes so you avoid. When you avoid you are not engaged as part of the team.

6.    You feel you can’t get better so why continue to participate.  Burn out sets in.  You practice and practice, but simply can’t get any better. You feel like everyone else is getting better and you feel farther and farther away from success and being a contributing member of the team.  It’s possible your parents are pushing a little too hard and you don’t want the pressure any longer so you decide to quit.

7.    You resent your parents for pushing so hard.  Your parents want you to succeed more than you do.  It becomes more about them than you and you wonder why you are working so hard.  There never seems to be a level of success because the bar is always being raised.
If you are feeling any of these consequences you are in a place where you could use some help.  This is where working with a professional mental game coach becomes an incredible asset.  Working with a mental game coach will get you out of the rut and back on track to enjoying yourself.

To learn more about perfectionism and what you can do to beat perfectionism please send your questions either to Ask Coach John, or fill out the Contact Us form on the web site.

John R. EllsworthMental Game Coach800-608-1120.

Tags: Perfectionism, Fear, Failure, Mental Congestion, Confidence, Self-Esteem, Self-Talk, Flow, Awareness.


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